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Blog 23: Father's/Fun Parent Day!

Updated: Aug 27


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Happy Father’s Day to all those who are biological fathers, stepfathers, grandfathers, honorary fathers, pet fathers, and any others I may have missed. I'm very lucky to say I will be celebrating with three fathers today. Not all mine, I hasten to add. My dad, David, my husband’s, Roy, and, of course, the father of my children, Steve. All fantastic dads, and I’m lucky to have them in my life.


I have very fond memories of my childhood days with my dad. What was the father figure like in your life while you were growing up? I probably shouldn’t admit it, but mine was the clear favourite parent. My poor mum was the one who told us what to do and when to do it, while Dad would come back from work and have fun with us.


From my experience of seeing other dads and the numerous videos on social media, I have to admit that they seem to be the general go-to parents of mischief and manage to get away with being just as reckless and silly as the kids. Meanwhile, most mums are doomed to be the sensible grown-ups.


It's a little different in my house. I’m pretty sure I’m the silliest person, closely followed by my hubby, and then our children. I’m known for taking things a pinch too far and getting a lot of eye rolls and sighs from the rest of my family. Although this only serves to amuse me and encourages my antics even more. Perhaps my dad’s influence as I was growing up has just instilled the fun element in me. But then, why stop just because you're older? Life can get way too serious, so if I see the chance to add a little humour, then I grab it while I can, and tweak it by the nose.


When I think of the time I spent with my dad as a child, I remember arm wrestling, playing games, sitting on his shoulders while we walked into town, and pulling his ears to make him turn right and left. The patience he must have had trying to help me with my maths homework while I zoned out, because it was not an easy subject for me, and he had to go over the same thing several times.


Another thing I remember is that I believed he knew everything. Whatever I asked him, he seemed to know the answer. If I had a problem, he was the one I would go to first, and today, along with my husband, he still is. When you put your trust in someone and know them well, you know you are going to get the advice you need to hear, even if it may not be what you want to hear.


This brings me nicely to our writing part of the blog. Who can you trust when it comes to getting advice on your stories? As I’ve mentioned before, we all have blind spots when it comes to editing and reading our own work. Therefore, we need trusted people to go to who not only know what they are talking about but will give you the feedback you need to successfully develop your story.


I have signed up for a few different Facebook writing forums and have found that a lot of writers use family and friends. Now, I’m not saying you shouldn’t, it just depends on what you are going to get from them.


Before becoming a professional editor, I gave feedback to friends and family on their writing. Nowadays, I am honest, although not brutal, I try to find a balance that is helpful but clear. However, when I was in university and began to critique other students' work, I was so worried about causing upset that I barely told them anything, except that it was good. This really wasn’t useful. If it was good, then I should have said what was good about it. What parts did I enjoy the most and why? They also needed to know what areas didn't work, that may have caused confusion or just didn’t read right. Not only that, but pointing out the errors in grammar and punctuation?


If your family and friends tick all the boxes and know how to give you an honest account of their findings in a positive way, then fantastic, get them on board. But if you're not getting useful information or they're doing it in a way that makes you feel like you want to give up, or worse still, punch them in the face, then it's probably better for you and them to find other people to rely on.


There are Beta reading and writing groups that swap work. So, writers can help each other improve their manuscripts. I use Facebook, but you can look at other social media and local writing groups too.


Another tip is to get a few different opinions. We all have different tastes and preferences, so just because one person has given what they feel is excellent advice, it doesn’t mean that other people will follow suit. The person you ask may not be a fan of your particular genre or style. Get a small group of people to read it and compare the feedback. If the majority agree with certain aspects, such as they feel it should be written in first person and not third, then it is a good idea to go with the advice.


The good thing about writing is that it isn't set in stone. Once you've written it down or typed it up, it won't be destined to stay that way forever. If you make a change, and really don’t like it, then you can revert back or try something new. It's all about experimenting until you get it right. And there are so many ways you can write it! But that is the topic of another blog.


Okay, writing exercise time! As I haven’t spoken about writing techniques today, I thought a writing prompt was in order.


As we have been thinking about people we trust, why not try writing a short story about someone who has been sworn to secrecy about something, but needs to share this information to stop something awful from happening. What is the secret? And what will they do?


If you feel this prompt is up your street, then give it a go. You can post the results below or on my Facebook self-edit group and get some feedback.

 

Right, I’m off to celebrate Father’s Day and possibly cause a little mischief. See you next week and try not to behave too much. We creatives need a bit of fun!

 

 
 
 

1 Comment


Excellent tips as always 😁

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