Blog 12: Wait a Mother-huggin' second!

Happy Mothers' Day!

It’s that time of year again, in the UK that is, where we celebrate and show thanks to our mothers. And I’m hoping my children (and cats) take the opportunity to show me some appreciation and love for all the things I do for them each day. Because let’s face it, us mothers do a LOT!

If you think about it, the job of a mother is incredibly diverse. They are carers, cleaners, teachers, organisers, cheerleaders, counsellors, alarm clocks, nurses, play workers, waitresses, cooks, taxi drivers, banks and advocates. I sometimes wonder whether I should put all these skills on my CV! And we juggle between these roles, more often than not doing several simultaneously, while trying to sort out our own tasks and lives, like some demented circus entertainer. Can you imagine this written up as a job description? So many things to do, 24-hour service, immense pressure and responsibility. The pay? Oh, well it isn’t paid per se, but you get a present and card on your birthday, Christmas and Mother’s Day. Do you want the job?

But of course, we aren’t in it for the money, we do it for love, awww or sometimes ARRRGH! Or perhaps a lot of ARRRGH, depending on how your week is going. Because it can be one of the hardest jobs in the world, but we do it nonetheless. I’m sure any mother will agree that as hard as it gets, those moments of joy make it all worth it. Though perhaps don't ask them on a bad day. All jokes aside, if my children are happy and healthy, I can breathe a sigh of relief and know I am doing something right. And when they give me a hug, make me laugh, and use sarcasm to try and win an argument, I know they are mine and they are perfect ... in their own way.

If you have written the character of a mother in one of your stories, were you able to incorporate just how diverse they were, all their flaws, strengths, and little quirks? As part of a Fiction lecture at university, we were asked to think of a character, give them a name, age them, and think of their traits. The tutor then proceeded to go around the class and ask us random questions to see how well we knew our creations. Such as what their favourite food was and their hobbies. What did they have in their pocket and why? It was fun creating these little details as we went along, a bit like putting together a character jigsaw puzzle.

How well do you know your characters? Have you given them the depth that they need and that your readers can relate to? One of my mates, who I met at uni, does personal profiles for each of her characters when she writes her stories. Perhaps you already do this, but if not, it is really useful to enable you to get into the head of your character and portray them more realistically on the page.

But, as in real life, characters adapt and change according to their experiences. They must have a character arc, that shows how their story has changed them. There should be some form of evolution, even if it's only subtle. Something clicks into place and makes their life different somehow, and this has all come about from their reactions and actions as they navigated through the circumstances of their story.

Becoming a mother, or a father, definitely changes a person and it seems to happen overnight. That natural instinct to protect your child at all costs is life-changing. The shy girl from my school days would certainly never have imagined speaking up for her children one day, or throwing off her shoes, jumping into a ball pit, and climbing up a very slippery slide in socks, to rescue her screaming four-year-old that was having her hair pulled by a little boy at the top. The experiences in your life alter you, as they certainly have, me. How have your characters' experiences shaped them, and is it for the better or worse? I do love a juicy villain!

As it’s Mother’s Day, I will, like so many others, remember mine who has sadly passed away. This is my first Mother’s Day without her and it’s lovely to remember the kind of character she was. She spent a huge part of her life struggling with Bipolar, which altered her personality to some degree. But despite her difficulties, she had an unfathomable strength, she never complained and no matter what was happening to her, she spent her time caring about everyone else, something that her illness couldn't take away. The memory of her fierce rugby tackle hugs that nearly knocked me flying always make me smile. Maybe one day I will try to write about her and hope that I can portray all the pieces that made my mum. But for now, happy writing everyone!